Just because a woman shows a romantic interest in me does not mean we are a good match. Boy, have I learned that from the romance school of hard knocks. In hindsight it is clear that often what I thought was strong attraction was simply a case of the relishing an attractive female’s attention and advances. As a codependent, my need to be appreciated is extraordinarily high while my ability to sort out what is good for me is usually low. My need to be needed can be a blinding affliction sometimes. Knowing my tendencies does not make the habit go away of being pulled toward incompatible women who are interested in me. Rather it helps me stay aware of my inclination so I can resist giving in. The more I refrain, the less difficult it has become to avoid mismatched relationships where we ultimately both get hurt.

A good relationship is a give and take from both people.
A bad relationship is one person giving and the other taking.
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