Male Codependence

The tendency to fall in an obsessive kind of love can almost always be traced back to one’s childhood and early adolescence. Factors like abandonment issues, mental or physical abuse, being neglected, being compared to one’s siblings and similar situations which may lead to the feelings of being ‘inferior’ or unworthy in a child may lead to the emergence of an emotional void in him/her. It is this void that they are trying to fill with the acceptance and love of the other person. It has also been observed that usually it is people with a low self-esteem who develop the tendencies of obsessive love. In case the other person is not a part of their lives anymore, they convince themselves that their return will automatically solve all their problems and make them happy again. They thus create an illusion for themselves and move farther and farther away from the truth. Also, the way a person learns to love is conditioned during his/her childhood. For example, a child who is not shown healthy love and affection during his formative years, may go on to have dysfunctional relationships later in life just to gain attention. Psychiatrists also believe that children from alcoholic families may be at a greater risk of developing love disorders and addiction. Other reasons for why this obsession makes way is that there is a lack of self-confidence in the person. This leads to insecurity, feelings of vulnerability and a perceived failure in their relationships. By Parul Solanki http://www.buzzle.com/articles/obsessive-love-disorder.html

Staying silent is like a slow growing cancer
to the soul and a trait of a true coward.
There is nothing intelligent about
not standing up for yourself.
You may not win every battle.
However, everyone will at least know
what you stood for—YOU.
Shannon L. Alder