Male Codependence

The past is a bottomless pit. No matter how far I fall into its depth there is no bottom; no sense to be made of it; no previously unknown reality to be found. Sometimes I yearn to forget the past, but could not be who I am without it. As I remember, it’s critical to acknowledge those memories are about who I ‘was’, not who I ‘am’ or ‘can be’. Yes, to a large degree I am a product of my past. However, as I man I am still moldable clay, not as pliable as I once was, but still with the ability to be shaped. It is my choice, and FULLY my choice, if I stay the same or not; whether I grow or not; whether I take responsibility for myself or continue to blame others and my circumstances. “There are no lessons to be learned from the past. This is the first thing I learned from it. There is nothing back then that there isn’t here now. There is nothing here now – nothing that matters – that wasn’t back then.” Tom Lichtenberg

I have learned that if you must leave a place
that you have lived in and loved
 and where all your yesteryears are buried deep,
leave it any way except a slow way,
leave it the fastest way you can.
Never turn back and never believe
that an hour you remember
is a better hour because it is dead.
Beryl Markham