Male Codependence

Asking for what I want and need from others is still frequently difficult. It used to be almost impossible. Most anything someone I cared about wanted, I’d do without question. Usually I’d do what was asked of me and then throw in a lot more that was not requested. Yet, I felt guilty asking for someone to do the same for me. It felt like I was imposing and it embarrassed me to ask even when the courage could be summoned. I’m better today, but asking for what I want and need is still damn difficult because it makes me feel weird; like I don’t deserve to have my needs and wants met. Relationships need to be a door that opens both ways. When efforts are allowed to mostly flow only one way, what is shared ends up half-way starved with one person  burdened with too much received and the other far too little.

There are three things that a child can teach an adult:
To be happy for no reason;
To be always busy doing something;
And to know how to demand,
with all one’s might,
what one wants.
Paulo Coelho